Week 12/13

I'm a ding dong. If I can't even figure out what week I'm in, how the hell am I supposed to figure out how to raise a child? I'll chalk it up to pregnancy brain. (There is such a thing according to my book). In a nutshell, when this picture was taken (last night), I was 12 weeks/2 days pregnant. The lightbulb went off. I wasn't 12 weeks pregnant (DUH), as I initially thought. I was working on my 13th week. The good news - I now look a bit better than I thought and I can attribute a bigger belly and weight gain to that extra week that pushed me into the 4th month. Bad news - by the time we share the news with our families and friends, we'll be in the 17th week, just starting our 5th month. It's a really long time not to share the most exciting news of your life with those closest to you. But we've been keeping the secret this long, what's another 3 weeks, right? I think the looks on both our families faces (in NY on 3/21) will be priceless.

Oh and for the record, my hair did not look that bad when I looked in the mirror before the picture. I swear. Maybe it is time for a new camera.

Little Jewish jumpin' bean

A-MA-ZING!

So Steph and I went in to check for Downs (some lil' measurement thing in the back of the neck)...anyway, the ultrasound was incredible (and no Downs...or at least the risk is the same as a 20 year old, which is very low)!

Today we also discovered that our lil' critter is actually a lil' person - all 2.5 inches (size of a plum). Skinny legs with lil' toes, tiny lil' arms with itty bitty fingers and one giant head. We also discovered that this little tiny person has an amazing ability to leap (see video). He/She is a born skater and surfer, I can just tell.

We have never been this excited. It's our little person. It feels real, and it's incredible. Holy shit, I'm gonna be one of those incredibly annoying parents that brags about how amazing my kid is...nah...just in the blog...so if you're reading this, you asked for it. I am wondering how long I have to wait to take it surfing though. I mean, it's practically hanging out under water now.

Heart beat or a sound bite of Steph's gas? It's a 157 beats per minute. Way to go lil' critter.

Our kid is transparent!

Little Jewish Jumping Bean

I wish we had the entire video of the ultrasound. It was freakin' bananas! This is still pretty funny...I mean, how many of us can leap from a laying position? Of course if you lived that close to Steph's bowels, you'd jump too.

Notice the lil' heart beat flutter at the beginning and end of the lil' clip. It looks like a bunch of flickering dots.

Week 11

Morning sickness has gone and baby belly has arrived.

Grandma Freda

For those who know me, you know that my Grandma Freda means the world to me. She's 94, lives on her own and is feisty as ever. Over the past 31 years, we have shared many special times, from summers in Fort Lauderdale, afternoons at Coney Island and Nathan's, and my most fondest memory - letting me spike her hair into a mohawk with an ungodly amount of gel. I've always known that we've had a special connection, one that goes beyond the typical grandma/granddaughter relationship. She was truly one of my best friends growing up, and to this day, continues to be an incredible source of strength, wisdom and great stories.

It is because of this connection (and Grandma's 6th sense), I have to share a story. Normally, I speak with Grandma Freda a few times a week, usually calling her during the morning or early afternoon. On December 27th, while out for a friend's "Last Day of Work" Party, I got a voicemail from Grandma Freda at 8pm PST (11pm EST). I immediately started to freak out, thinking the worst since she never calls at night, let alone at 11pm her time. I checked my voicemail: "Hi Stephie. It's Grandma. I was lying in bed and started thinking about you and Jason, and I had to call you to tell you that I love you a million dollars." What's so incredible about this is not only was a 94 year old woman up at 11pm, but that was the day Jason and I found out we were pregnant. And Grandma Freda somehow knew it.

Valentines

As usual, Jason and I had a wonderful Valentine's Day, where he planned a repeat of last year (per my request). I went to the gym, and arrived home to an anxious Jason with a back pack full of goodies. We went to the end of our street and had a romantic candlelit picnic along the water with sparkling views of Alcatraz, Tiburon Hills, and the Bay and Golden Gate Bridges. Normally Jason cooks my favorite foods, but instead he went to Whole Foods and got all of them - fried eggplant, mac-n-cheese, string beans, squash and a saffron poached pear for dessert. It was perfect and kind of surreal, in that it would be a our last kid-free Vday for a while. It will be interesting to see what we do next year with kid in tow.

Jason and I don't exchange gifts on Valentines, but it was hard to help myself when just the week before he confessed that he wanted his own pregnancy book. Ok, if you know anything about Jason, you know that he doesn't read - recipes, directions, or books. Nothing. Except for Harry Potter. I was shocked beyond belief and thrilled that he actually wanted to be so involved with all my bodily functions. I knew I couldn't get him just any book. So I found this one at Borders:
Within 30 seconds of opening it, I knew it was perfect. We spent the rest of the evening reading it together, laughing our butts off. There are far too many funny parts to include, but here's one:

"By the last trimester, you may not even want to get your hands on your wife's breasts. You'll find that if you give them a squeeze, they may leak a few drops of colostrum (practice milk). It's thick and yellow and has the consistency of wood glue. Seeing it may make you lose all desire for sex. But it may inspire you to build that coffee table that you've been putting off for so long.

I know that you don't like having to put your favorite playthings in storage. The only comfort that I can give you is that since some men gain some weight when their wives are pregnant, you may develop a nice pair of knockers to fondle all your own."

Chapter Titles include: Not Tonight Honey, Your Basal Thermometer Is Giving me a Headache; How to Make Love to a Cup; My Wife as a Dog; Let the Bodily Functions Begin; The "I'm so Hungry I Could Eat Your Face" Syndrome; How to be a Domestic God; Heads She Wins, Tails You Lose; Twelve Things You Should Never Say to a Pregnant Women; Ways You Can Help Your Clutzy Wife; They Grow Up So Fast...In Utero.

We have a pretty big test this week - the first trimester combined screening (also called nuchal translucency screening) where they assess the baby's risk of having down syndrome. They do this via ultrasound, counting the amount of fluid in the baby's neck. The outcome is that they give you odds of having a baby with down syndrome based on the ultrasound test, a blood test, your age and background. If we get pretty good odds, we don't need any further testing for down syndrome and alike abnormalities. Keep your fingers crossed an look out for another ultrasound pic.

Top Ten at Ten

So here we go...

The top ten reasons I can't sleep at night.


10. I can't tell anyone that we're preggers

9. I'm nervous that if we have sex, some little critter's hands are gonna grab something "important" of mine.

8. Steph tells me that "not on my best day, will I ever reach some little critter's hands".

7. Steph's gas.

6. Steph's boobs have increased 3 sizes and she still won't let me see them.

5. If she's making all this "supposed" milk, why do I still have to go out to the store and get milk for coffee?

4. She finally has an ass, and she still won't let me see it.

3. I'm getting drunk at parties we go to together by drinking her "drinks" so that no one finds out she's pregnant.

2. I'm gaining weight because I need to eat the food she can't, so that no one finds out she's pregnant (un-pasteurized cheese goes straight to my hips).



1. Steph's boobs have increased 3 sizes and she still won't let me see them.

Beards and Baby

So is it just me or is the wifey looking thinner than week 6? That sexy outfit can't hurt either.

Anyway, here we are...just a few weeks away from entering into our second trimester and announcing to everyone that we're gonna be bouncing baby parents. It's seriously killing me, not being able to tell anyone. It's all I can think about. Work has been busier than ever, and all I can think is, "I'm gonna be a freakin' dad"! I mean, I'm still doodling pictures of robots and lil bunnies killing eachother...is this the face of the modern dad (did I mention I'm rocking a nasty homeless looking beard?)? Steph hates the beard, but I'm trying to convince her that it's the only way to keep all those super models away from me. Plus I think it's bad-ass.

I guess that's all I really have to say right now, so until week 10...talk to ya later.

Cough to the Beat

Last week was hell. I was not only sick with sore throat and a hacking cough, but also morning sickness kicked in full gear. And to top it off, I had to incessantly listen to my parents preaching "you need something stronger than Tylenol" almost daily. Yes, I wish I could've taken something that made me sound less like a deep, sultry phone sex operator, but my options (just like my wine intake) are obsolete. Just add it to the list of wonderful things I can't have while pregnant. I long for the days of wine and drugs. How do rock stars deal with pregnant?

I had my first doctor's appointment with my new OBGYN today. Most people could care less about their doctors, but they're just as important as picking your husband. Just like with Jason, I scored. Dr. Bason-Mitchell had a hard act to follow, as I was on a first name basis and private phone extension relationship with my old OBGYN, but she lived up to my friend Niki's hype. (She delivered Niki's baby too). She was warm, real, and took a full, unrushed half hour with me. I immediately loved her.

The best part of the appointment, by far, was the end. Dr. Bason-Mitchell surprised me and asked if I wanted to hear the heartbeat. Hell yeah! I wasn't expecting it, and as with most things these days, it was another first. The Dr. cautioned me that it might be too early to hear it, but within 3 seconds, we heard it, loud and strong. It was so surreal. There really is a critter in there. I"m still constantly amazed by the fact that there's another person living inside me, and it's not a parasite.